Tapping your way out of emotional eating: Fact or fiction?

I’ve got two words to describe Sunday night’s episode of “I Can Make You Thin:” not impressed. Although McKenna did a pretty good job of explaining why people use emotional eating to cope with their feelings, the whole episode had an infomercial feel to it.  It had a high fluff to content ratio, with lots of testimonials and recaps from the last episode. 

The worst bit: his tapping technique. When I first learned that he would be demonstrating this technique during this episode, I was immediately skeptical but decided to try and be scientific about it and give it a fair chance.  But it just seemed so silly, not to mention hard to remember how to follow (tap here, tap there, hum this, look here, etc.).  I came across a great blog post where the author did some research and found some unsavoury information about the man who developed this technique: again, not impressed.  I suppose it might be helpful for some people, if they can manage to remember how to do it, but my feeling is that it works mainly by distraction.  In fact, it reminds me a lot of a highly controversial technique developed for treating trauma called “Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing” (EMDR).  Although some studies have found it to be effective, the general criticism levied against it is that is uses the usual process of treating trauma, but adds in the repetitive eye movements as a form of distraction from the high levels of emotions that arise.  It seems to me this tapping technique works in a very similar way.

Now don’t get me wrong, there’s nothing inherently wrong with distracting yourself. If you’ve got the urge to eat when you’re emotional, and you decide to distract yourself by turning on the TV, listening to music or checking your email, then that’s a lot better then giving in to the urge.  However, in the long run, distracting yourself every time isn’t going to help you solve the problem that got you feeling emotional in the first place.  Plus, you’d end up spending a whole lot of time being distracted instead of really living.  The best strategy is to deal with that problem directly, and to use coping skills that can help you deal with the overwhelming emotions when they happen.  There are lots of things you can do to cope instead of distract yourself: take a bubble bath, go for a walk, call a friend, express your needs, write in your journal, practice mindfulness technique, and lots more.  Therapy is a great way to help you learn these coping skills that you can rely on again and again, and will help you need them less and less over time.

Should you take an antidepressant?

Many of my clients ask me if they should take antidepressants. Although I’m not a doctor and cannot prescribe or recommend the use of medication, in general I’m against the use of antidepressants for mild or situational depression.  If a person is so depressed they can’t get out of bed or maintain a minimal level of functioning, then I’m all for medication to help them get through a rough patch.  In these cases, medication is a must.  But the idea is to make this a temporary solution, not a permanent one.  The downside of taking an antidepressant alone to treat depression is that you never learn to deal with the problems that are leading to the depression in the first place.  By taking a medication, you’re treating the symptoms, not the real problem, which is equivalent to putting a bandaid on a deep wound.  It might stop the bleeding, but the second you take it off the bleeding starts again. 

I came across a great article that discusses the use of antidepressants from a holistic point of view. Go here to learn more.  Note that this article is mainly geared towards women, but much of the content applies to men as well. 

Can TV make you thin?

Last night a new show on TLC premiered called “I Can Make You Thin”. Although the title is a little too sensationalist, and the host, Paul McKenna, a little too showbizzy for my taste, I think this show is a welcome change from your usual weight loss TV programming.  Shows like “The Biggest Loser” and “Last 10 Pounds Bootcamp” are demeaning and mostly counter to what I believe constitutes a healthy lifestyle.  This show, on the other hand, doesn’t focus on militant dieting and exercise, but rather follows some of the basic principles of intuitive eating.

In this first episode, McKenna outlines what he calls the Four Golden Rules:

1) When you’re hungry, EAT: a revolutionary concept, I know.  But so many diets disconnect us from our own hunger signals, saying we should only eat at prescribed times.  This has two unfortunate consequences: either you starve yourself between meals, setting you up for a binge later on, or if you do eat between meals, you feel guilty for it.  In the end, the result is the same: you’re not listening to your body.  But if you start tuning into your own hunger signals, and actually give yourself permission to eat when you’re hungry, you’ll end the cycle of deprivation and guilt.  Check out the Hunger Scale I have posted in my Resources section to help you decide when you should eat.

2) Eat what you want, not what you think you should: another pitfall of dieting is you’re forced to eat certain things, instead of paying attention to what your body is telling you it wants.  I know, if you give yourself permission to eat what you want, you’ll live on nothing but pizza and ice cream.  Well, maybe for a while, but once you implement Rule #3, you might be surprised (do Twinkies really taste as good as a lovely chocolatine?).  By labelling certain foods as “bad” or “wrong” or “forbidden,” all you’re doing is making them seem more attractive.  If everything is permissible, then everything is equally attractive.

3) Eat consciously: this is by far my favourite rule.  When you’re about eat, sit down, take a deep breath and become conscious of the food you’re about to consume.  And as you eat it, take one bite, put your fork down, and chew it slowly and carefully.  Make a meditation out of it.  Turn off the TV, get rid of the newspaper, stay away from the computer and pay attention to your food and only your food.  Savour every bite, and go to almost theatrical extremes to enjoy it.  Don’t pick up your fork again until you’ve swallowed your last bite (this works wonders, believe me).  By doing that, not only are you actually enjoying your food more, it will take less to satisfy you.  Which brings me to the last rule…

4) When you think you’re full, STOP eating: this is a tough one for the clean-your-plate club.  But remember, it’s better to let the food go to waste than go to your waist.  Or you can always eat it later.  When you aren’t used to listening to your body it can be difficult to know when you’re full.  Try closing your eyes every so often and tuning into what your body is telling you.  The Hunger Scale can come in handy here again.  If you’re still not sure, stop anyway.  And if you’re hungry 10 minutes later, eat!

Tune into TLC on Sunday nights at 9:00 to watch the rest of the series.

New website launched!

After much anticipation, I have finally launched my newly redesigned website! In addition to a sleek new look, my website now features a well-integrated blog and a continually growing list of free resources to help you end your struggle with emotional eating.  Be sure to sign up for my newsletter and get my free report, “5 Ways to Get Control of Your Emotional Eating” (look to the right of the screen, near the top). 

If you like the look and feel of this site, I highly recommend the services of Depthskins Design Studio - check out their website at http://depthskins.net/

Does this clutter make my butt look fat?

I think Oprah can read my mind. Just last week I discussed the similarities between compulsive hoarding and compulsive eating, inspired by an episode of Dr. Phil.  Today’s episode of Oprah had my favourite clutter expert Peter Walsh discussing the relationship between excess clutter and excess weight. OK, so maybe she can’t read my mind (after all, Oprah does own Dr. Phil - or at least his show, anyway) but it’s pretty interesting that I’m not the only one who can see a link between the two.

Right at the beginning of the show, they put up a quote that practically had me jumping out of my seat: “Eating more and buying more is an attempt to fill the need for something more.” Yes! This is what I’ve been saying all along. In fact, Walsh has written an entire book on the topic, “Does this clutter make my butt look fat?” Check out his book here.

A couple of things stood out to me during the show. First, this woman kept her treadmill (what she called her “high-tech bag holder") folded up in the kitchen. Can you imagine staring at that thing every time you go into the kitchen for a snack? Talk about guilt-inducing. Walsh couldn’t have put it better when he told her “your treadmill is making you fat.” Because for anyone who’s ever been stuck in the overeating/guilt cycle, just looking at something that makes you feel guilty can lead you to eat. As funny as his statement was, it couldn’t have been more true.

As the family cleared out the their stuff, they kept making comments along the lines of “I’m actually feeling lighter.” It is so important to take your environment, which includes both your physical surroundings and the emotional climate of your life, into account when you examine the context of your weight. If your life is cluttered with stuff, with issues, dramas, stress, problems, unhealthy relationships, etc., then the way you take care of your body is going to reflect that. In fact, Walsh pointed out that a lot of the stuff she had in her house was very similar to the things she ate: cheap, easy and not what she really needs. And what’s more, that stuff represented who she believed she was or who she wanted to be: a baker, a loving mother, the kind of person who actually uses wooden skewers to make beef satay. But instead of being those things, she was just collecting the idea of being them. Ask yourself: how is your environment affecting your lifestyle choices, or representing who you want to be?

I applaud this family for having the courage not just to appear on TV, but to take the steps necessary to finally move past this excessive lifestyle. The woman’s pain was palpable, and her desire to be better and do better was so moving. She finally realized that all of this was about more than just the stuff and the weight, but to some deeper issues that she hadn’t fully worked through. In fact, Bob Greene, Oprah’s personal trainer, put it best when he said that if you don’t focus on the issues underneath, you’ll never lose the weight. Couldn’t have put it better myself.

The next time you feel like skipping a workout, read this…

On my way to the gym today (and for most of the day beforehand), I tried very hard to convince myself that I didn’t really need to go. Because of course, I can always go tomorrow. Because I have approximately 1 million items on my to-do list that are awaiting check marks. Because I’m a little tired. Because Tuesdays are always a long day. Because Oprah’s on. Because I’m hungry. I think you get the picture.

Now don’t get me wrong, I don’t hate exercising. I can’t say that it’s the highlight of my day, but nor do I avoid it like the plague. Once I’m there, I’m fine, and I kind of like it too. It’s more that I would rather be doing something else.

I eventually forced myself to go, telling myself I’d feel better if I went. While I was pedalling away on the elliptical, the wheels in my mind were spinning equally quickly. I started thinking about why it is that I can always come up with a million and one reasons for why I can put off my workouts. Why is it that they always feel so optional? As if I’ll only work out if the inspiration hits me, or I force myself, and the second something vaguely more interesting or important comes up, the workout is the first thing to get crossed off my list.

This got me thinking about what kinds of things in my life I consider optional, and which I don’t. Eating is not optional. Neither is going to the bathroom, showering, checking my email, and going to work. But most other things are optional, including watching Oprah. I soon realized that the common thread running through the “non-optional” activities in my life is that they are all necessary in some way or another for survival (except checking my email). If I don’t eat, I’ll die within a few days. I may not die if I don’t work, but if I can’t make ends meet, I won’t be able to buy the food that keeps me alive.

This made me realize that exercise is not really all that optional. The only difference between eating and exercising is that if I don’t exercise for a few days I won’t die. At least not right away. But if I never exercise, I will die a lot younger than if I do. I’m just making up numbers here, but what if working out 3 times a week added 10 healthy years to my life? Wouldn’t I be cursing myself at 60 or 70 when I’m decrepit beyond my years? Wouldn’t it be nice to live longer, and enjoy it too?

The next time I tell myself that I can skip my workout just this once, I’ll remind myself that I’m not really wasting time, I’m buying time. I don’t know if it’ll work, but it’s worth a shot.

Why diets don’t work

Here’s a great article I found about why diets don’t work: click here or go to http://www.register-herald.com/features/local_story_029220702.html?keyword=topstory

The only thing I would add to the end is to take a look at what food means to you. Eating well and exercising are no-brainers, but if you really want to stop dieting forever, you have to develop a healthier attitude towards food.